Overwhelmed

I've got the week off for my birthday, and I'm trying to get pre-wedding stuff taken care of.  It's hard to do while unmedicated, which is why I made an appointment to see my LNP tomorrow for a med consult. I've been off Dexedrine and Wellbutrin since at least November, and I've reached my limit. I need help. I've got an appointment with my LNP tomorrow afternoon, and I should be back on track in no time.  Not that my track is set up properly, but it's mine, dammit, and it works for me. 

Meanwhile, I've gained over 20 pounds in the last year and I'm having daily panic attacks about getting fat again. I can't fit into most of my clothes anymore, and I feel like a disgusting blob.  Rocker Boy says I have to stop treating myself like shit, that I'm beautiful and a hottie and he loves me the way I am. While I believe he's telling me the truth, I still can't help feeling like shit. I've been stress-eating like crazy, that's a big culprit. So once I get back on my ADHD meds, it'll cut down on 99% of my anxiety, and I'll eat normally again. 

Speaking of which, I think I'm going to make beer chili for my birthday.  I made some for Rocker Boy's 40th and we both loved it. Needed tomato sauce, though. Mmmm. Beer.

I'm trying to figure out this marriage license stuff and ... uggghh.  So much work! I can't wait to get back on the meds so this'll be less overwhelming. But I love organizing things and filling shit out, and I like to be as prepared as possible because I'm so flighty with the ADHD. I'm working on this online marriage license form, but I don't know how to spell my soon-to-be mother-in-law's maiden name.

WORK WORK WORK!